Our big day is almost here! It is coming so fast that it we’re going a little crazy. Well, it is making me (Kristi) go crazy with the details, which in turn is making Ron go crazy… hehee.
Things like which napkins should be used with which table clothes? Which flowers should be set with which center pieces? What order should everyone walk in? Oh and let’s not for get the most important item; the wedding favors! Is it considered a faux pas to give out Halloween candy as a wedding favor? I mean people don’t really do much with the wedding favor’s anyway, or do they??? At least this would give them something to eat, and it wouldn’t be a hard tooth breaking candied almond?
So here I was going crazy with every detail… almost insane!!!! I was feeling overwhelmed and completely alone in this mirriad of details that I thought needed someone to look over and take care of. Is this normal?? I thought the engagement was suppose to be the BEST part, the fun part, but here I was getting heart burn and going nuts over all the LITTLE things so much so that I lost focus on the important thing; Ron and Me. I know I’m not the only one this has happened to.
If you’ve seen the movie Sex and the City, you’ve seen Carrie go through something very similar. Although her pre wedding to do list was full of money, and she had a budget that could afford almost anything her heart desired, (she didn’t seem too stressed out about her wedding favors to tell you the truth)… the idea was that she become so involved with the wedding she forgot about Big. How sad! I think putting the importance on the wedding is somewhat normal, but it is sad when we have to be reminded that it isn’t the MOST important thing. I feel some condolence knowing that if the producers in Hollywood decided it was a noteworthy plot, you know other women in this world have gone through something similar but maybe not to the same extreme.
The second reason I know I’m not alone is because of my friends in this world. Yes I’m talking to all of you married friends! Of all our married friends we talked to, not one of them claimed to have a different experience. In fact, what we’re feeling is so normal and common it would be unusual if we weren’t a little emotionally challenged at this time and got absorbed in the details once in awhile. No one told us they loved the engagement period before the wedding. Quite the opposite in fact! We were both so surprised. Why didn’t we know this? Why do we put ourselves through all of this? I can only say one thing: this experience has made me more convinced then ever that Ron is the one for me and I thank God for our little 15 years later reunion.
In the midest of a “wedding favor” break down, Ron looked at me in his calm way and said “I don’t think anyone is going to look at these favors and say ‘ewwe, why did they choose that?, it is so tacky’, or ‘why did they use these flowers? they just don’t go.'”. And at that point, I smiled… gave a little chuckle and took at deep breath because I knew he was right. No one goes to a wedding to pick it a part or judge your style and your choices. They go to weddings to celebrate love and the two people who have found each other.
Over the last month Ron has been wonderful. He would often looked over at me, or come close and puts his arm around me whispering…. “everything will be alright…. you and I will be together and don’t forget the most important part is us. Nothing else: not the flowers, the music, the dancing, the drinks, nothing else matters as much as we are together and I can call you my wife. I love you Kristi, so much that I knew you were the one for me with out any doubt almost as soon as we started dating. You are my soul mate and you make my life so much more fun, colorful and exciting. I love you Mrs Rapp.”
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